Cans someone provide a timetable?

It gets better.  That is what I have been told and I mostly agree.  Can someone provide a timetable?  I like to plan.

Sometimes I still dream  about the ex-wife.  It happened last night.  I wish that would not happen.  I do not know how to make it stop.  The dreams are usually pleasant enough but then I wake up and realize there is no longer any value in dreaming about with her.   I really want her out of my head.  She does not deserve to be in my dreams.  My ex, my supposed life partner, is gone.  It is a disturbing and inefficient waste of my dreaming.

 I do dream about other women and other pursuits.  That is healthy.

One day, the person you'd envisioned navigating life with, growing old with, sharing family moments with, unilaterally desecrated that fantasy by walking out.  You learn that she has been unfaithful and is a liar.  She made the decision, yes this is worth the price this will cost me.

Immediately I saw the entire future change.  It did not look better.  What particularly bothered me was the change to my family.  As the song says, sometimes you can’t get back to good.  I was really looking forward to happy family holidays, vacations and mutual grand parenting.

I really did not envision myself in this place.  After the desecration I started out alone, depressed, anxious and unsure.  A severe blow to my self- esteem.   I still struggle to make sense of it.

I have been through the stages; denial, bargaining, anger, grief and acceptance.  I have not made an effort to reduce the cost for her.

I have created a new life that is pretty good.  I am a pretty lucky guy.  I am free to pursue my interests and to choose my obligations.  I am thankful for that.  You get knocked down.  You get up.  That is getting better.